Family

How to Build Your Community

What lies do you believe that keep you from connecting with friends? I used to be held back from spending time with people because I was afraid of awkward silent moments. I felt like I was innately boring and wouldn't have anything interesting to talk about.

I found that one solution for this was to get together to do an activity. Working on a project together or playing a game can help make connecting easier.

Here are 7 tips to help you foster community and practice hospitality:

  • Practice smiling at people and looking them in the eye.
  • Practice making small talk. This doesn't come naturally to everyone, but it is the starting point for deeper conversations.
  • Don't wait until your house is perfect to invite people over for dinner. If your house is messy your guests will just feel better about their own home. You will be doing them a service.
  • Don't wait for someone to invite you for coffee. Take the first step.
  • Make a phone call or text instead of waiting for someone to call you.
  • When people make room for you in their lives, take it, even if it’s just hanging out with them and helping them with whatever project they are working on.  That may be all the time they have available, so honor it.
  • In order to make meaningful connections, you must be intentional. Get out your calendar and make a plan.

YOU are the solution to lack of community!

Strangers are just friends waiting to happen. -Rod McKuen

A man who has friends must himself be friendly (Proverbs 18:24a NKJV)

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Tips for Being Present

It is very easy for me to get lost in my own agenda and tune out the people I love. I don’t mean to be rude, I just get into task mode, and once I’m there, I can be hard to reach.

It is easy to feel overwhelmed when I don’t have my to-do list straight in my head. I can easily get caught up in thinking about all the stuff I wanted to work on, even if I don’t plan on working on it that same day. It is easy to feel overwhelmed when I don’t have my to-do list straight in my head.

Tomorrow’s to-do list can easily creep into today.

Solutions to this problem are:

  • make a to-do list so that your head feels clear
  • set the list aside
  • realize that you don't need to worry about tomorrow's tasks today
  • focus more on the important people in your life and your connection with them, than on being productive

Key Idea: When it’s all said and done, family is more important than tasks.

 

Know well the condition of your flocks,
And pay attention to your herds.

Proverbs 27:23

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